Friday, September 25, 2009

Freaky Friday

So, m'dear fellow blogger Dara Laine has started a thing called Freaky Friday on her blog.

I'm thinking I may start that here. On this blog. For shits and giggles.

Dara's is primarily job-focused, but I figure that I'm going to turn mine into a sort of "whatever amuses Nyx" blog.

Today's Freaky Friday (can we insert some sort of dramatic music here? How about Enter Sandman?)is concerning a few job listings that I found quite...amusing.

Thanks for the idea Dara!

Job 1:
"We Are Seeking a Dating Coach" - they call me Dr. Love......I don't even think I have to explain why this one is weird.

We are a new service company looking for ONE very special person to head this new program.

We are looking for a woman who is sexy, smart, classy and entrepreneurial in sprit.

Someone who can read men and women alike and understand the psychology of interpersonal relationships and communications when it comes to the “dating game”.

Your job will be to work with our clients, one on one and take them from what they currently show to as close to a 10 on the dating scale as possible by listening, learning, observing and then guiding and coaching them to success in finding their perfect match.

This is a new program for our firm, so we are looking for an idea person and someone who will lead and take this pilot program to a viable business unit which ALSO serves a need in a market which is too focused on numbers and not enough on success.

This will start out as a part time position and then with success, turn into a 6 figure income for the right woman.

Serious inquiries only please.

Ok, it wouldn't be that bad if only they told us WHO THEY WERE. What person in their right mind puts up that type of job listing and doesn't say who they are? Another thing that bothers me is that they say it's for a "firm." ...What exactly does this firm do, if they're seeking a dating coach? Usually people who hire dating experts are magazines or websites or something like that - not a firm. And I find it hard to believe that there's no job requirements - anyone can call themselves a "dating expert."

Hm. I'm getting a flashback to the movie Hitch...and strong feelings of a scam.

Thousands of salespeople working with us around the world in over 30 countries!
Join us!
Call for more info
404 207-5091

Yea. Right. I'm going for the phone right now.

Job 3: Crabby Dick's
part time positions available for kitchen manager, line, expo and dish .must be over 18 years of age .
also hiring for serving must have abc card and be at least 19 years of age. the abc card may be obtained by contacting the delaware liquor control board.
also hiring marketing /events planner/administrative assistant
please contact

Ok, this one isn't so weird. My dirty mind just couldn't get over the words "crabby dick's"

Job 4: Rewritters

I'm thinking this one takes the cake.

I am looking to hire 2-3 re-writers. I am looking to start someone as early as tomorrow. I pay $1 per 400-600 word article. With proven reliability and quality work, pay is increased after first month of employment. You will be paid once per week, within 24 hours of when you have completed your weekly project. If you would like more details about this position send me an email.

Wow! A WHOLE ONE DOLLAR! Man, sign me up. Right now. Get out the contract, I am all over it.


  1. OMG The dating game one is completely absurd!!!! AHH! GREAT FIND! hahah

  2. $1? that is so ridiculous. hahahaha. and I agree with you on the "crabby dicks"...i can't stop repeating that phrase in my mind now...

  3. Dara: yes. yes it is.
    Meg: I have a feeling it was a typo, but hey, they need to learn to re-read what they're writing for a job ad.


Because I'm needy.