Warning: morose and broody post ahead. You've been warned.
So this week has been very "blah." I'm going to Buffalo with Pookie soon, and am looking forward to the trip. I need something to snap me out of the mood I've been in the last few days.
I keep on trying to cheer up, but if I'm being honest with myself I'm still a bit sick from the H1N1. I don't think that I'm still contagious (Lord I hope I'm not), but a stuffy nose still remains, along with an annoying persistent cough.
Work has been sucking lately - we've got a new general manager who can't manage worth beans. I'm trying to give him a chance, but he's absolutely awful. His management skills absolutely suck. He's pitting my coworkers against each other by recruiting a few of them as "spies." I don't understand why he would think that appropriate as a manager, but whatever. He's just the latest in a long line of managerial fuckups.
Everyday I go to work, I have to think up excuses not to call out. Honestly, there's only two reasons I show up every day instead of calling out and using up my paid time off - it would be irresponsible for me to pawn off all of my work on my co workers, and I need the paycheck.
Day in and day out I show up, and I'm absolutely exhausted by the end of it. People have been slacking, and I don't know how the heck to get their bums in gear. It's not my job to get them working - I'm not a manager, just a worker bee.
So I'm job-hunting, as I have been since I got my degree. I'm trying like hell to find a job, but let's face it - there are just no jobs for people with no experience. I find myself competing with people who have five, ten, fifteen years experience, and kick-ass recommendations to boot. Pookie is in much the same boat as I am. It's rather disconcerting. I realize that having a diploma isn't a magical golden ticket to the wonderland of employment, but I at least figured that it would count for something. I guess not.
The only thing that I can do is keep on chugging and hope to hell I can find a job that will not only pay the bills, but that I won't absolutely despise either.
So, I'm sorry if my updates are a bit sporadic - I'm just trying to figure things out. I'm also participating in NaNoWriMo (an online writing contest), and so I'll be focusing a good bit of my energy there (I have to write about 2,000 words a day...and I'm already behind).
So, that's what's happening in the land of Nyx. I realize that this post isn't full of the humor and sarcastic wit (ha!) that I usually present, but honestly I just don't have the energy tonight. I debated about not posting this, but that wouldn't be right. Life's not all happiness and sunshine and rainbows. Life's full of the nitty-gritty, and sometimes it sucks. And sometimes it's just "blah."